SUBS Syndrome
I would like to introduce myself as one who suffers
from SUBS syndrome. Well, I guess I don’t really suffer from it,
but the people around me sure suffer from my affliction at times.
What is SUBS you ask? SUBS is a condition first named with the
help of my best friend a few years back. We’ve had it all our lives; we
just never knew what it was. Though our findings are not published, and
would likely never be recognized by any professional journals, many
people have been self-diagnosed since our first announcement of the
condition.
SUBS: Sudden Uncontrollable Bursts
of Sarcasm
SUBS is a genetic condition and is often highly contagious. Those
who are not affected are often times left in a stunned condition, as
they have no clue what is being said around them, nor do they understand
the reason for laughter all around. At times, they may feel as if they
are being teased or picked on by SUBS carriers, though that is rarely
the case.
At the present time, there is no known cure for SUBS. Some people are
able to control their outbreaks when the situation calls for it; some
are able to go into remission for hours or even days at a time. But SUBS
is one of those things that is simply ingrained in the inter-workings of
the mind.
I am a member of the SUBS community with a genetic disposition to the
condition. The genetic line runs heavily through my family on both my
maternal and paternal sides. As with most cases, SUBS affects every
member in my family. Even my young nieces and nephews are showing signs
of the condition. There is no getting through a conversation without
someone’s SUBS showing through.
Thankfully, most of the people I know suffer from SUBS, as well. In
fact, SUBS is how I met DH while I was living in Scotland. Him being British and all,
he never expected that he would meet an American who could
understand sarcasm and wit. If only he knew what he was getting himself
into!
I am not ashamed of my condition. No, in fact, I am very proud of it. I
get the jokes. I get the puns, and I totally get British sitcoms (well,
almost). I love a funny little one-line zinger. Even more so when most
people around don’t understand what was said.
Don’t be ashamed if you, too, are afflicted with SUBS. Share the
laughter! Share the joy! Maybe your little bit of sarcasm will infect
someone else … oh what a happy day it will be when the whole world is
dripping with satire, repartee, and irony!
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